Letting Go of Anger

Are you angry a lot of the time? Many people learn to react angrily to life on life’s terms because they haven’t developed alternative coping skills. Some people blame others for their anger and avoid taking control of it and learning how to cope with it. It can be a toxic emotion if you haven’t learned how to deal with it. Being always angry is also a symptom of depression. It’s hard to have the right attitude in recovery when everything in your head is negative.

If the above description reminds you of yourself, it’s time to shift your attitude. Just like anyone, you can change your attitude and learn to let go of anger.

Owning Your Anger in Recovery

Owning your anger is an important part of coping. It’s okay to feel your feelings, but you don’t have to act angry when you feel mad. “They make me angry” is something a lot of people tell themselves. Not everyone is a mind reader, and not everyone lives to do your bidding! If you’re angry, it’s because there’s some hurt inside of you.

You may be angry because your feelings were hurt, or because a situation reminds you of something in life that has happened before. Either way, the anger is yours and yours alone. Blaming others for your emotions isn’t healthy. Think about why you feel angry – what triggered you? Did you have a bad day? Were you frustrated because you were stuck in traffic? Did you feel embarrassed about something?

There is always emotion behind your anger, and much of the time, it’s something deep inside of you that you haven’t ever examined before.

Things to Do If You’re Angry

Instead of telling somebody off, flying into a rage, or punching a wall, take ten minutes when you’re angry. Here are a few things to try next time you’re mad:

Call your sponsor.
Go for a 15-minute walk.
Go for a swim.
Write in a journal.
Listen to your favorite music.
Read a book.
Take a long shower.
Share at a meeting.
Make art.
Share your feelings with a friend.
Write a letter to the person you’re angry with. (DO NOT send it.)
Binge watch your favorite show on Netflix.
Cook dinner for everyone.
Take the dog for a long walk.
Jump rope.
Say the serenity prayer.
Hand wash the dishes.
Clean the house.
Mow the lawn.

As you can see, there are a lot of easy ways to get “out of” your angry head and begin to cool off. When you’re less inflamed, you can start to examine the reasons for your anger and a better way to approach your anger next time you’re feeling it.

Remember that recovery is about progress, not perfection. It’s the little things that help you build new patterns and make changes. Try to let go of your anger one day at a time.

Considering Sober Housing?

Recovery is a process, and many people like the idea of transitioning to the “real world” after treatment. Living with other people who have the same goals, in a safe and hopeful environment, can help you stay focused on yourself and your recovery. Learn more about your options by calling us at 760-216-2077.