760-216-2077
When you’ve been in recovery for a while, you find some stability and serenity that you didn’t have before. But sometimes this serenity is mistaken for boredom, which can be a big trigger for some people to use.
Once you’ve settled down into your recovery and have stayed clean for a good amount of time, what else is there to do besides work your steps, go to meetings, and call your sponsor? Things aren’t as dramatic as they once were when you were new. But there is still plenty of growth to work on, depending on your individual needs and tastes. You have a choice what to do to expand your horizons as a clean and sober person.
Here are a few suggestions to help you on your way:
Being clean is just a stepping stone to a new way of life. You have a lot of time to explore your world and find new ways to enjoy it. Don’t be too timid about finding new hobbies – and don’t neglect your 12-step meetings. Every day is a chance for something new.
Sober Living
Sober living is a great next step once you’ve completed a treatment program. Are you interested in living among your peers in a safe, fun environment as a part of your recovery program? Get in touch and learn about your options. You can call us at 760-216-2077.
Staying positive in recovery can seem like a battle, at least when you first get clean and begin to sift through your emotions. Negative self-talk can be harmful to you and hinder your progress in sobriety. Learning to become more positive will help you achieve more of your goals, build your self-esteem, and stay on track in your new way of life.
What is Negative Self-Talk?
Let’s face it, we all have an internal voice that tells us things about ourselves, whether they are true or not. Many of these things are negative, and nowhere close to reality. For example, some people call themselves stupid over the tiniest thing, like dropping a plate or missing a bus. Mistakes can sometimes seem like astronomical problems when your internal voice is so negative. When we do this, it’s called “negative self-talk”. It can be a huge issue for those in recovery.
These negative self-beliefs can be dangerous and cause failure because you’re continually looking at the negative, and are also telling yourself that you are meant to fail.
What does negative talk sound like? Here are a few things people tell themselves that can get in the way of recovery:
Negative self-talk can prevent you from trying new things because you feel shame about yourself. And it’s not true, anyway! Many of these thoughts come from a place of hurt or shame in your childhood and have been reinforced throughout the years. But they’re self-defeating at best and cause self-hatred at worst. How can you be good at something if you give up quickly? How can you learn to handle things if you give up before you try?
Changing Your Self-Talk
Changing your self-talk won’t take place overnight, but you can get started today with more positive feelings. One way to help yourself feel better is to write out some affirmations for yourself and practice them every day. For example, when you find your self-talk keeps calling you stupid, start your day with a statement that changes the dialogue. “I am learning new things every day, and I am feeling smarter than ever before” is a great one to try. “I’m a good person, and I do good things for others” is a good answer to when you’re feeling “no good”.
Write down all of the negative talks you can think of on a piece of paper, and make new affirmations on index cards so that you can scroll through and read them to yourself every morning.
Talk to others such as your peers or therapist to learn other ways to banish negative self-talk. As you spend more time in recovery, you’ll find more examples of being the person you want to be, rather than the person your disease says you are. Hold on to your moments of accomplishment and give yourself credit.
Life After Treatment
Your journey in recovery doesn’t end once you have finished inpatient treatment. A sober living situation, aftercare plan and other activities can help you stay on course as you adjust to life after treatment. Want to learn more about your options? Please give us a call at 760-216-2077.
When you first get clean and sober, there’s a lot on your mind. Recovery can be both exciting and scary, especially when you don’t know what your next steps will be. Soon, however, you learn coping skills and make friends. Life starts looking up as you begin to confront your challenges head-on and still stay sober. Some days are better than others, however, and sometimes it’s hard to focus on the positive.
Not all of us are born with a sunny disposition, and it sometimes takes a genuine effort to keep a positive attitude or see the "good side" of things.
What kinds of things can you do to change your mood on a bad day or prevent you from living in a negative rut?
Here are five great ways to help you stay positive in recovery:
Staying positive is an essential aspect of recovery, but sometimes things happen that cause us emotional strife. Don’t forget your necessary tools – if you’re down, pick up the phone, get to a meeting, or find a sober friend to spend time with. There are plenty of people who want to help you stay clean and sober, and they do genuinely care about your welfare.
Are you looking for more information on living in a safe, supportive, sober environment? Do you want to know more about aftercare programs to help you adapt to the “real world” once you have finished inpatient treatment? Give us a call. We can help you find out more about your options. Just get in touch at 760-216-2077
Everyone has fears, but for many in recovery, these fears can hold back progress and cause a lot of worries. When you were using, you probably were able to suppress some of your anxiety. As a person in recovery, however, fears will crop up now and then. Some types of fear are healthy and can be motivated to make a change. For example, if you’re afraid your temper will make you lose a relationship, you might decide to go to anger management classes and learn new coping skills.
Other fears can make you stagnant, however. Some people fear change, for example. They’ll do anything to keep from changing, even when changing would benefit them.
Anyone can change, however, and anyone can learn how to cope with their fears.
Many of these fears are ones that are experienced regularly – and you’ll want to learn how to cope with them. Luckily, as time goes on, you’ll learn to be less frozen by fear and begin to walk through your concerns.
What are some of the most common fears in recovery?
These are just a few of the fears many people face in early recovery. You may have others that crop up along the way. Fear is a universal emotion that you will learn to cope with after you have walked through it a few times. Don’t hesitate to share your worries with others – they, too, have had to face many of them. Although it’s not a “fun” emotion, it is a normal one. If you let it control you, there’s a good chance you’ll miss out on a lot of good things in life.
How Sober Living Can Help
In recovery, it’s often said to take things “one day at a time.” This is an excellent mantra to live by, especially when you feel overwhelmed by various emotions. Things will get better, and this too shall pass. A supportive environment can help make things more comfortable when you've started your journey.
Living in a community of supportive peers can help make your recovery journey easier. By the Sea Recovery in San Diego sets the tone for the top recovery houses, offering help with aftercare and day-to-day living in a group setting. Please give us a call at 760-216-2077 to learn more about your options. All calls are 100% confidential, and we are happy to answer your questions.
When you think of the word “health,” what comes to mind? When you were using, you probably weren’t doing healthy things. The World Health Organization defines health as a complete state of mental, spiritual, and physical well-being. These are needs that remain the same across cultures. When you were using, did you make it a point to take care of your health? Did you make sure that you went to an annual check-up and saw the doctor when you were sick? Probably not.
It’s hard to be a health or fitness lover while you’re stuck in active addiction. Depending on your drug of choice, there is possible damage that you may need to address at some point in life.
Taking Care of Your Physical Health
Just like all well-built machines, our bodies need more maintenance, too. It’s essential you get a full checkup when you first get clean and follow up on doctor recommendations.
It may seem difficult at first, but caring about yourself and your physical health is an important part of recovery. You’ve already taken a significant step towards better health by quitting drugs and alcohol. Now it’s time to focus on your long-term health. How is your diet? Do you eat vegetables and fruit daily? You can nourish your body with better nutrition. Try to get the right amount of fruits and vegetables daily, and try to exercise every day, even if it’s just going on a 15-minute walk.
Taking care of yourself also means regular doctor appointments. If you have health worries, don’t keep them to yourself. You may feel guilty for abusing your body by using for so long – but judging isn’t your doctors’ job. A doctor wants to help you heal, and if you are having problems, it’s best if you make her aware of them. Taking care of hidden or chronic diseases can help you stay healthy for life.
Taking Care of Your Mental Health
Stress is a difficult thing to live with, but it’s also a fact of life. Learning how to live with stress without using substances is an integral part of living in recovery. Taking care of your mental health includes learning self-care techniques, learning to de-stress, and reaching out to others when you’re feeling negative. It also means taking care of any co-occurring disorders.
Depression, anxiety, and trauma are common issues that people deal with in recovery. If you suffer from these disorders, or you think you might have a mental health issue, take care of yourself. Seek out a referral to a mental health professional to get help and learn to live with your disorders.
Reaching for Spiritual Health
In recovery, you are asked to believe in a power greater than yourself. Some people in recovery already know what higher power they believe in, and decide to attend church services or begin meditating. Getting closer to a higher power will make the 12 steps easier to take, and having faith in a higher power can help you find solace during troubling times.
But what about people who don’t have a religion? How can you develop a spiritual life if you’re not sure what you believe?
You don’t have to decide on a higher power overnight. Your spiritual health doesn’t have to rely on a diety to feel spiritual. Do you love spending time in nature? Or do you find a particular musician uplifting? Look for the things in life that make you feel spiritual. Seek out activities that make you appreciate life and the world around you. Ask around to find what other people do when they struggle with spirituality.
Live in a Healthy Environment
Many people find that a sober home is a healthy environment to live in while they are transitioning from treatment to the "real world." Are you looking for an option like this? Get in touch to learn about our sober living homes and find out if they are appropriate for you. Call us at 760-216-2077.
In recovery, you quickly learn that stress is still a part of your everyday life. Whether you’re in groups all day, working part or full-time, or returning to school, there can be little things that set you off or frustrate you. Recovery doesn’t make anyone immune to stress. In fact, you might discover you’re more sensitive to it at first. It’s normal to feel stressed or overwhelmed when you’re re-entering the world. What is important is that you learn that there are things you can do to lessen the effect of stress.
Here are five great ways to tackle daily stress:
Stress is a regular part of life, but the more you cope with it, the less it will get to you. Learning new coping skills and applying them in the "real world" is an essential aspect of recovery. Take care of yourself, and reach out when you need to.
Are you looking for more information on living in a safe, supportive, sober environment? We can help you find out more about your options. Just get in touch at 760-216-2077, and we'll be happy to discuss living choices with you.
Accepting responsibility is an integral part of self-esteem self-respect and character building, both in and out of recovery. When you were using, you probably found excuses for bad behavior. This behavior was normal in active addiction. Denial can be powerful for people who have a substance abuse disorder. A lot of behavior is rationalized when it’s hard to deal with the guilt you have while you’re using. When you get clean, however, you are starting a new lifestyle and transforming your identity. Being an honest with yourself is one of the first barriers to cross. Which means that you have to become responsible for your own actions.
Being responsible for your life is an essential aspect of recovery. When you were using and refused to take responsibility for your actions, you were giving your power away to your addiction. Today, not only have you stopped using, but you have also started living again. You are making responsible choices to help yourself grow and change. And you are accountable for your own decisions, both to others and to yourself.
Why Responsibility Matters
An important part of adult life is taking responsibility for your actions and reactions. This means making amends, apologizing when you’re wrong, paying your bills on time and showing up when you say you will show up. When you decide to be irresponsible, you’re not going to feel great about yourself, and you’re in danger of backsliding into other patterns that feed addictive behavior.
You always have some form of responsibility for the things going on in your life. This is a powerful concept. Where once you were under the spell of your addiction, you’re now free! You’re free to build a life full of love, honesty, and self-examination. You’re free to improve your life and work toward your goals.
There are, of course, some things in life that are completely out of your control. You can’t prevent accidents or health problems, or the way that other people react to you. You can’t change the past, cure yourself of diseases or stop somebody you love from doing something destructive.
You can, however, acknowledge the part that you play. You’re responsible for your actions and your reactions. If you feel “out of control” or tempted to do something that jeopardizes your recovery, you have a responsibility to take care of yourself. This means going to a meeting, making a phone call to your sponsor, or otherwise reaching out to your support network. You don’t have to be alone if you don’t want to.
Before, when you were in active addiction, you were powerless. In recovery, you have the power to make positive choices in your life.
Being Responsible Takes Acceptance
Acceptance is part of the path to a more responsible way of life. Sure, it is hard to accept everything that is life throws your way, but when you do, you’ll find hope and serenity await. Attitude is a big part of acceptance – you can only do what you can do. Accepting that you don’t have control of everyone and everything can help you keep a positive attitude about life. You’re not alone in your worries, fears, and emotions.
Acceptance isn’t just about letting go – it’s also about letting other people help you when you need it. Accept that the world is bigger than you, and you don’t have all the answers. You can be responsible for your life by taking care of yourself and asking for help when you need it. Try to adopt an attitude of acceptance – life happens! You can’t control everything. But you can find ways to cope and take responsibility for the things you can do. For example, maybe you lost your job and fell behind on your bills. It happens. But perhaps you can still make a payment plan so that you don’t have to declare bankruptcy or lose your possessions. With an attitude of acceptance, you can focus on what you can do.
For some people, responsibility means easing back to the "real world" after treatment so they can stay in a safe environment. A sober home is a great way to transition back into life while still focusing on your recovery. Want to know more about your options? Give us a call at 760-216-2077 to learn about our sober home options for men.
The term “willpower” has often been used to describe how people make significant changes to their behavior. People often believe that willpower is an inner strength that makes it possible to do things such as exercise daily, change your diet, or change other unwanted behavior. So where, exactly, does willpower fit in when it comes to recovery? Is there such as thing as willpower?
If you love somebody with addiction, you may wonder why they can’t just “will themselves” to change. We’ll explore this mentality and why willpower is a myth, not supported by modern science at all.
Myth: Willpower Creates Changes
Willpower isn’t a personality trait, and it’s simply untrue that some people are born with it while others are not. Addiction is a disease that affects brain chemistry, and it is impossible for people with a substance use disorder to simply “will themselves” to stop using. Just as other life changes, there are many factors involved in quitting using and starting new, healthier behavioral patterns.
An athlete may describe their workout routine as a result of willpower when reaching their fitness goals requires a combination of traits – such as consistency, an ability to visualize their goals, and a solid plan for success.
Willpower is an archaic word used to describe behavior changes, but psychiatry and science don’t back the word up as one single behavior or thought process. Every behavioral change requires work that’s not simple a matter of “willing” yourself to “do better.”
In the case of the athlete, yes, it requires a commitment to get up every morning and go for a run. Commitments have been shown to work when a person dedicates themselves to a new action every day for up to 60 days. Willpower isn’t what drives the athlete, either; their thoughts and behaviors are the things that promote their life changes. Thinking about how they will win a race and visualizing it is standard practice for many athletes, while they also practice their runs and make sure they fuel their bodies with the proper nutrition, so they are in top shape when the race comes.
Fact: Changing Behavior is a Process
Recovery, and the act of quitting using itself relies on both physical changes (no longer using the drug), mental changes (replacing negative thought patterns) and behavioral changes (not picking up a drug when the person feels like using.)
These changes take place over time. Not using substances is always the first step to recovery, and this is why it’s so important to seek out treatment and a strong support network. The first weeks and months of recovery are a fragile time for the addicted; emotions feel raw, and there are many triggers in life that may cause a desire to use.
Detoxing from a substance and getting help are the primary steps toward recovery, but the process and behavior changes must be reinforced by a recovery plan. It is essential for a person quitting drugs and alcohol to seek treatment in a safe, therapeutic environment. While it would be nice to think that willpower can help with this, addiction research shows that treatment is the best way for a person to change their lives.
Getting Help
Are you interested in learning more about your sober living options? We can help you find a safe place to live with your recovering peers. You’re worthit. Learn more about sober living at 760-216-2077.
Everyone's first thought. Must be overwhelming. Impossible. Luck. Miracle. Well, there seems to be a pattern with those that 'got it'.
Lots of meetings. Sponsorship. Stepwork. Personal growth. Education. We've seen it all. From big book thumpers to higher education, there seems to be an underlying factor: being connected and being thirsty for growing as an individual.
Paradoxically the inner growth is balanced by the connections for it is easy to get lost wanting to be 'spiritual'. The sense of bond in early recovery is spiritual in itself given the distance from others during addiction. The vulnerability of sharing and being open with others in sobriety psychologically develops trust and belonging, a highly elating feeling and chemically supportive to the healing.
And yet another display of a community's portrayal of stigma and ignorance: not in my backyard. That doesnt happen in your neighborhood, right? The fact that recovery resources are available in a city such as treatment centers, sober living homes and detoxes, are only a sign of the sensitivity and care that a community places to America's addiction epidemic. It is not in a specific zip code. Its everywhere. A sign of a community coming to a realization that punitive efforts are not efficient and that recovery should be part of their culture. C'mon, help your youth or be pulled back by an inability to offer resources.
for more information on addiction, recovery resources, sober living homes and addiction treatment centers, please contact: http:/www.bytheseasandiego.com
